Archive for the ‘uk’ Category

re-imagining the future of the EU

Tuesday, February 6th, 2018

it’s 2035. 10 years prior (that would make it 2025), the 6 west balkan countries located in south east europe have joined their balkan brothers and sisters from greece, bulgaria, croatia, slovenia and romania to be part of the european union. 16 years prior, the united kingdom had officially exited the EU. the whole so-called brexit process took almost 3 years to organize and then it took another 5 years to kick out all of the bloody foreigners who weren’t smart enough to pass the UK citizenship test in order to stay in. during this time, julian assange dies on an exercise machine in the mexico embassy in london as ecuador kicked him out and cancelled his passport many years prior.

then in 2024 the UK had a third referendum on the european union and almost 65% of the population voted to re-join the union. but france vetoed their application. as did the federal republic of germany and the new german democratic-socialist republic of germany. in 2019 germany officially voted to re-divide the country as the previous incarnation wasn’t working out as one had hoped. in 2020 the visegrad group briefly expanded from poland, the czech republic and slovakia to include austria. but then chancelor sebastian kurz decided he was tired of being forced to eat refurbished chocolate and hang out with short, old, men in H&M suits from countries he would never voluntarily visit with his long suffering pitbull affectionately called h.c. strache.

this is the end of part 1 in our on-going imaginary series about the imaginary future of and the balkanization of the european union.

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nytimes gets it wrong about english

Saturday, May 6th, 2017

jean-claude juncker, president of the european commission jokingly (?) said that the english language was headed for the doors in europe. the nytimes defends the use of english and the new york rag erroneously states that english will still be the language of choice in the EU because it is the official language of malta and ireland. but when countries join the EU they have to pick 1 language as their official language. when malta joined, they picked maltese and ireland picked irish. so juncker is actually right. as the brits head for the doors the english language will officially go with them as there will be no other country in the EU whose stated official language is english.

cameron advocates turkey joining the eu

Wednesday, July 28th, 2010

unlike germany’s chancellor, angela merkel or france’s president, nicholas sarkozy. cameron is pro-turkey, when it comes to the country joining the european union. considering that the country is growing at an annual rate of 7% per year (unlike germany, france, or currently the uk), one would think that the common market would welcome a country that is self-sustaining and is not in dire need of tens of billions of euros to bail out its bank and government. but is this postering? or is cameron really trying to move the tory party closer to the center so that he can one day rule independently of the liberal dems?