Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

trump neglects austria

Thursday, October 19th, 2017

according to a recent interview with sebastian kurz (aka Wunderwuzzi), the 31 year old winner of austria’s parliamentary election, the US president Donald trump has not called to congratulate him. last month, it took trump 4 or 5 days to get around to congratulating germany’s chancellor, angela merkel, after winning her 4th term to tie helmut kohl (the mentor she knifed in the bag) as the longest serving head of state of germany since kaiser wilhelm. –yes, she has beaten konrad adenauer as well as ole what’s his name. we thought trump loved winners. from the speech he gave in poland  (which is in eastern europe) about protecting the WEST. we think trump might be suffering from an early form of dementia. we hope someone could rely a short text message to mr trump immediately. maybe sarah huckebee sanders? it should go like this. dear boss, AUS (not to be confused with the other AUS–AUSTRALIA) is in WESTERN EUROPE. POL is in EASTERN  EUROPE. although AUS is a DEMOCRACY apparently 26% are NAZI-esque. xoxo SHS

 

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blade runner 2049 vs sean young or shall we say sean old

Tuesday, October 10th, 2017

where’s sean young in blade runner 2049? crusty harrison ford was wheeled out to co-star in the disaster that is blade runner 2049 while the young version of sean young was halogrammed and body-doubled in. a quick online search (bing anyone?) shows young is 57 years old while ford is 75. yet the spirit of sean young dominates the film. the young sean young, not the old lady sean young.  but sean young looks good. in retrospect, maybe ridley scott realised that it was sean the replicant and not harrison ford the blade runner who carried the 1982 film. yet somehow someone couldn’t resist 100% writing the 57 year old woman out of the film and replacing her with the 28 22 year old version of herself. we hope the 57 year old version of rachel got a good pay check. even the 70 year old edward james olmos was able to play the old version of himself. the best bit about the film was not actually jared leto but that barhad adi apparently got his teeth fixed. we are tired of reading about people beating up on ryan gosling. although we too can’t tell the difference between ryan gosling and ryan reynolds. but we here heart canada. doesn’t everyone? they are the kinder, gentler version of the gun toting conspiracy theorists south of the border.

the most rational people in germany live in munster

Tuesday, October 10th, 2017

as our watch on the european union, we at ablogaboutwhatever would like to make a belated comment about germany’s recent federal election. ok. drum roll please. according to our research, in order to make it into the federal parliament, a political party needs to amass at least 5% of the vote. this year a far right party –after 70 years of not always trying, exceeded this hurdle. out of all the voting districts in germany (aka wahllokale), only 1 town called munster (in a country of 82M people) gave the far right party less than 5% of the vote. maybe that nobel peace prize that the EU won a few years back has gone to people’s heads. or maybe the citizens of the 28 EU countries are pissed off that they never receive their percentage of the prize money, which we estimate would be about .00000002 cents per person. this would explain brexit as well as the slow meltdown in spain.

the other corporate welfare queen

Tuesday, October 10th, 2017

we at a blog about whatever occasionally like to beat up and make fun of elon musk as the white south african who metaphorically squeezed a black man (former US president barack obama) and shook down the US government for billions in green subsidies to finance his personal hobbies. then got the world to recognise him as a genius. we don’t care that he takes a salary of $1. but we are sure USA taxpapers would love to see his expense reports.

richard (alt right) spencer can now be added to this list. apparently the cotton mill he co-owns with his mother and sister (who nobody seems to be able to find) is located in an impoverished region of louisiana that is 67% black. not only is the mill completely mechanized (thereby providing the convenient cover for not being able to provide jobs for the locals), according to many sources the mill has received at least 2M USD in subsidies from the US government which richard (white national supremacist or whatever you want to call him) claims to despise. we think he should take his 3rd and either return it to the US government, donate it to malia obama, or re-invest it in a struggling rural area filled with white people.

what does cexit mean?

Tuesday, October 10th, 2017

catalonia — located in the north east part of spain, is set to declare independence today. last week carles puigdemont–president of catalan swore he would make the announcement on monday. well now it is tuesday. given that the referendum for catalonia to succeed from spain technically did not happen, it is perhaps a powerplaythat president puigdemont last week declared the referendum a success. we’ve known for a while that spain is essentially a copy-and-paste country. and that the basque region has also threatened to form its own country for decades. what would be the end result for spain if its supposedly most prosperous region breaks away. can one say a region is more prosperous than another if one’s productivity is 23% of GDP while another region contributes 19%. the 4% difference is significant. but it is not as significant as the gulf between northern italy and southern italy. does the rest of spain really need barcelona –a place destroyed by monopol and wallpaper magazine articles in the 90s and the 00s and now overrun by western yuppies? probably.

ultimately, what has probably happened is that puigdemont spent monday speaking with prime minister mariano rajoy to gain more independence for his region. this would be the most likely end result. as it would be a win-win situation for catalonia. otherwise catalonia would automatically exit the european union. although some concessions could be made regarding catalonia maintaining the euro currency, otherwise the 19 member eurozone countries would immediately be thrown into a crisis. we at a blog about whatever will say it is total crap that serbia’s president (aleksandar vucic) claims it is a double standard that the european union countries, like france as well as the european commission, assert that they would not recognize catalonia if it succeeds from spain, yet the EU recognizes kosovo which succeeded from serbia and was immediately recognized by everyone and his wee little brother. the primary difference between serbia/kosovo and spain/catalonia being, that spain and catalonia have not been embroiled in a decade long war filled with ethnic cleansing and religious conflict.

dunkirk part deux

Thursday, September 7th, 2017

just when you were sick and tired of seeing the same bloody actors in film after film, christopher nolan comes along and finds replacements for aging hipsters like johnny depp (see harry styles). years ago a friend went into great detail as to why she hated saving private ryan. number one, the germans were pure evil, not even a tiny bit of character nuance there. number two, until the end of the film you saw one recognizable actor after another. with the except of kenneth branagh –the older statesmen in the film have recognizable faces but that’s really it. we at a blog about whatever think that we are living in the age of the auteur with a side of superhero movies.

dunkirk and the men’s movement

Thursday, September 7th, 2017

it all started in the 1990s with the book iron john. this book talked about men going into the woods (or something like) to reclaim themselves. it spawned a bit of a movement. fast forward to charlottesville and take a u-turn via dunkirk. we choose to believe that the america’s far-right’s march on charlottesville was at its heart a cry for help. we will not digress into psychoanalysis as we at a blog about whatever do not believe in psychology although we do believe that mental illness should be treated by a psychiatrist and with lots of meds. like maybe “e.” which once upon a time was legal and might be once again.

the first time i saw the dunkirk trailer i thought, wait a minute. there are no women in this movie. and yesterday while perusing youtube watching behind-the-scenes stuff, it would seem to be that minus christopher nolan’s wife slash producer, the dunkirk set was a fraulein-frei-zone. does this matter? probably not.  no more revisionism plz. there were (most likely) no women on the beach at dunkirk. but nolan did toss in a couple of red cross nurses.  ernst hemingway would’ve enjoyed this film.

so here is our recommendation for a sequel. SPOILER ALERT. since kenneth brannagh’s character mentions his staying behind to help rescue french troops, we think that would be dunkirk II. for dunkirk III we’d like to see the retelling of the original story from the point of view of the german pilots and sailors (torpedoing the british ships). for dunkirk IV maybe a prisoner of war story with tom hardy could work quite nicely.

antifa vs. homeland security

Friday, September 1st, 2017

the trump administration seems to be busy. according to politico, the US department of homeland security has said antifa has classified their activities as domestic terrorist violence. not sure what that means. are they on like a list now. or are they just in the crosshairs? does this have anything to do with the trump administration trying to get an ISP to handover the 1.9M visitors to a webpage used to organize counter demonstrators for the US president’s inauguration.

mdma workst well on ptsd

Friday, September 1st, 2017

oh. so many acronymns. mdma (aka ecstasy) banned in 1985 is on the cusp of making an offical legal comback.  the encyclopedia britannica describes “e” as EcstasyMDMA (3,4, Methylenedioxymethamphetamine), a euphoria-inducing stimulant and hallucinogen. The use of Ecstasy, commonly known as “E,” has been widespread despite the drug’shaving been banned worldwide in 1985 by its addition to the international Convention on Psychotropic Substances. It is a derivative of the amphetamine family and a relative of the stimulant methamphetamine. Ecstasy, which is taken in pill or powder form, also has a chemical relationship to the psychedelic drug mescaline. just in case you wanted to know.

david duke troll

Monday, August 28th, 2017

david duke, the former grand wizard of the KKK (that’s klu klux klan) can be easily spotted in the comment section of any random article about the charlottesville massacre. he’s the one complaining about the bolsheviks. nobody under the age of maybe 60 or maybe 70 has ever heard that term. i vaguely remember it from an undergrad course on russian history. but i only took that course because my top choices were closed and nobody was interested in russian history.